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Why does life flow smoothly but not for me?

Have you ever looked at some one else’s life, or should I say, what we perceive of some one else’s life, and wondered why everything seems to be so easy for them? Why what they want seems to just happen, or maybe it just seems that way? I would suggest we think of this as the grass is always greener on the other side concept that we have all had experience of at some point or other. In fact, there are people who look at the flow of our lives with envy too, because we can’t actually imagine what something feels like to some one else. Their idea of hell might be the absolute opposite to us and vice versa. I have often laughed at how others have described my life and notice that even though their interpretation may be that my life was easy, the experiencing of it may not have appeared to be so, and its this that I bring up for discussion today.


Whenever we consider the concept of a free and comfortably flowing situation, we are ultimately considering our growth and its potential, and I’m sure you haven’t looked at it that way have you? For us, it’s just life and its idiosyncrasies and something we expect to offer struggle. In fact, I would go so far as to say we anticipate the opposite of a generous and effortless flow, because we have become conditioned to believe that, and this is the crux of the matter. Our conditioning has inhibited our awareness to the point that we no longer consider just how limiting or inhibited the flow of life has become. The slow boiling of the frog concept comes to mind and as much as we can recognise the validity of the concept, we haven’t yet learnt how to change it in the reality of life.


I have, on many occasions, had the opportunity to observe this principle in its projection of time flow and acknowledge fully, that I haven’t yet mastered the concept of managing it fully. But what I have discovered, is how to make it work for me more often than not, more consistently than not, and with greater longevity than previously. In other words, my focus has allowed me to determine the consistency of the flow that ultimately constitutes our lives to such an extent that I can honestly say things have changed for the better in every aspect of life, including my conscious engagement with the change that made this possible.


Having said that, I am also aware of just how habitual and persistent we need to be in order to achieve this and that’s where things usually fall apart, because we are not terribly “good” at creating beneficial habits, the reverse is more likely. So this means we need to be chasing the concept of aligning the principle of habit. If I said that a comfortable and effortless flow in life is indicative of our capacity to pursue and engage in our own growth and awareness, would you assume that focusing on that would change our perceptions of flow? You would think so wouldn’t you, and yet the answer is mostly no. But why you may ask? And that’s simple, the conditioning we spoke of, is now as much a part of human nature as the rest of our genetics and anything we perceive as hard or requiring persistent diligence, actually activates a device within the brain’s circuitry that separates us from the drive to acquire the new habit. In fact growth just sounds unpleasant and we haven’t even evaluated what that means yet. (Look out for a post or blog about this in the future!)


What does this mean for us then? That we give up on the hope of having a smooth and pleasant life that fulfils us and brings happiness? Absolutely not! It means we need to create the awareness that allows for growth to be perceived, even if it’s in the most miniscule amounts. That would initiate the beginning of more productive habits and with the simplest of methods this can revolutionise life, but it starts with a desire to change. Not to change all at once or everything about life, yourself or your circumstances, just the desire to take a step, even a hesitant one, towards the change that we would like to feel, if not experience, in the flow that describes life. For this we need but one thing, direction. The kind of direction that comes from within, with a passionate desire to support us on our journeys in life.


The subtle murmurs of the subconscious need to become something more consistent and constructive, and our capacity to perceive them, easier and more freely welcomed. It’s not as simple as figuring out what life is, but it is as simple as accessing the consciousness of awareness that constitutes life and that is actually inherent in us all and much easier to acquire than you would think believe it or not.


As a student of all things life related in this vein, I vouch for that with experience of my own as well as that which others have shared with me when applying the method. But the first step is always, and I mean ALWAYS to be curious about how life would feel without the resistance it typically applies to us, so that change and growth can be both recognised and invited with ease and enjoyment implied. My life’s work in a nutshell, to find the simplest of methods to devise this growth and change in those inspired enough to choose that for themselves. In this I count myself blessed to know many willing individuals and many curious ones too, but that door will need to open much wider if we as individual elements of a highly complex species, wish to thrive.

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